If theres anyone still out there…

Sorry!

For anyone actually still paying attention to this blog, apologies for not having written anything in AGES. I don’t really have an excuse other than I’ve actually been doing stuff, rather than sitting on my arse at my family home all day eating.

Loads has actually happened since my last update so I’ve got a few things to run through, as well as a little disclaimer at the end about any future posts.

OK LETS GO:

1. Diet – I’ve finished the LOFFLEX re-introduction diet now, and weirdly found that theres nothing that had a bad effect on my *ahem* movements. I feel like a little bit of a cop out truth be told. When I first got diagnosed and was all messed up (literally) in hospital and started writing this I followed and found some truly inspirational writers and bloggers who have similar conditions. I envisaged that at this point I’d also be having to find the best gluten free or dairy free places to eat etc. As it goes it doesn’t look like I have any of those problems which is good for me, and I am hugely relieved about that, its just me eating Pizza Hut rather than the local greasy kebab shop pizza doesn’t make for great “healthy blog” reading. Sorry ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
2. Medical…stuff – To be perfectly honest I cant really remember where I was last time I posted, but I think that since then I’ve had at least one more Infleximab infusion, which was my first hospital experience alone as my mum decided she had better things to do… I am of course kidding, she was insanely busy planning my little sisters 18th birthday party so I was a big boy and sat in hospital getting medicine-ed all on my lonesome, which wasn’t actually that bad.
   I’ve also had an Endoscopy (another camera, but in the mouth end this time) since my last post. I foolishly thought this would be the more pleasant end to have something shoved in, but apparently I was wrong. What nobody mentions in describing the two procedures is that when the camera is in the butt end, you don’t have to worry about controlling your breathing, worrying about vomiting all over the place, or having a REALLY sore throat for the few days after. Even the semi-sedation didn’t help massively. I never thought I’d say this, but I’ll take the camera up the back end any day over that thanks.
3. Socialising – So truth be told, this is kinda the main reason I haven’t posted in a while. Ironically while my last entry was about how little I do, in the time since I’ve been socialising left, right and centre! In the past few weeks I’ve been out with my home mates, out with my flat mates, been to 2 barbecues, hosted another barbecue and been to my little sisters 18th birthday party. This has been as exhausting as it sounds at times, but its been really great to get back to a relatively normal social life. 2 things that have been bugging me are as follows, I still don’t really have the knack of socialising properly. I find myself with even less to say than before, and when I do I get the feeling a lot of people don’t get that its ok to laugh at my self-deprecating poop jokes with me. Thats what I want, if I cant laugh at this i’m gonna go insane. The second is that I cant drink as much or as fast as I used to be, which is probably good for my health, but when you’re almost a full pint behind your flatmates and its your round to buy it just gets annoying for all involved. I feel more practice may be needed.
4. Other general life admin – 2 big things.
   I’ve pretty much moved back into my flat now, only back and forth due to the sheer volume of hospital appointments recently. This is a huge deal as its meant providing for myself again, and trying to remember all the grown up stuff I haven’t done in months. I don’t provide as well as my mum, but that was always true so I’ll have to make do.
   The second is that I’m due to go back to work VERY soon. I’m excited to get back to normal and all that stuff, and I think the time is right. I hope I can manage full working weeks like I used to, as I do still get tired more easily (fatigue it seems may actually be one of the on going symptoms). My exact return date is tbc but could be as early as this coming Monday… eeek.

That kinda leads me on to my final point about this blog. I’ve just re-read all my posts from start to finish, kinda to remind myself what has actually happened over the past few months. I’ve found writing in here really therapeutic, and it MASSIVELY helped the through the boredom in hospital, so thank you to anyone who supported me in writing. It meant more than you know, and all the proof reading my family did and comments from friends got me through some tricky times, so thanks.
Saying all that, however, as I get more and more “normal” I find myself feeling less of the urge to write. I guess its like the compulsion I had to learn to cook while I was at home, which very quickly went out the window. I might pick it up again at some point, but its not something that draws my focus any more.
Another reason for the probable reduction in the number of posts from here on out is this; if I don’t really have many specific dietary requirements, and my treatment isn’t going to change for the foreseeable future, I don’t have anything to write about. Sure going back to work will be different at first but that will quickly become normal. I feel like any posts I do if I force regularity will just be “Went to work today, it was ok, came home, ate dinner, went to bed. Didn’t poop myself all day”. Even I can tell that boring as hell so I don’t wanna get into that.

Hopefully I get something worth writing about that doesn’t involve me crapping myself for 2 months straight again, so I’ll let you know when I find out what that would be.